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Trust Nobody by Cashmere Cat

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Cashmere Cat Trust Nobody
Hogwarts Sorting Hat

We've sorted all your faves into Hogwarts Houses so you don't have to! The Sorting Hat has spoken, and it's time to see the results...

Slytherin - cunning, ambitious and resourceful.

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Kanye West: Kanye is out achieve his targets and ambitions by any means. He's not to be underestimated. Slytherins are all about self-preservation and you can't deny Kanye's efforts in that area of expertise. Plus, he really gets the Slytherin aesthetic. 

Zayn Malik: Because he just looks like that really hot Slytherin student that's always brooding at the back of the class, ok? Leave us alone.

Brendon Urie: Do you find it coincidental that he's the only original member of his band left? Hmmmm... interesting. And he's also posed with this snake so... 

Justin Bieber: Everyone knows that Justin was mentored into greatness by the Dark Lord of R&B himself, Usher. How do we know that the release of Purpose wasn't a just massive ploy to make us all his loyal subjects? Huh? 

 

Ravenclaw - witty, intelligent and smarter than you'll ever be.

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Halsey: Ravenclaw is a house where artistic and colourful wizards thrive - Halsey would be their Queen.  

Lorde: She's intelligent, wise beyond her years, too clever for anyone to drag... Lorde is basically Ravenclaw personified.

Troye Sivan: He's too witty for this world, he looks really great in blue AND HE JUST RELEASED AN ALBUM CALLED *BLUE* NEIGHBOURHOOD, DUH! 

Zendaya: Let's be real - she's better than all of us. If Zendaya actually went to Hogwarts, she'd be Ravenclaw Head Girl in 0.2 seconds. 

Hufflepuff - loyal, hard working, patient and a pleasure to be around.

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Taylor Swift: Even though Taylor has Slytherin tendencies, she's a Hufflepuff at heart. She loves to give, she enjoys a good hug and she's one of the hardest working gals in the biz! How could someone who is so loyal to that many friends not be a Hufflepuff?!

Hayley Williams: Because even though we totally thought she'd have gone solo by now, she has remained loyal to her band - the mark of a true Hufflepuff.

Patrick Stump: Because he's a precious cinnamon roll. 

Ashton Irwin: Ash would definitely be a cute lil muggle born Hufflepuff. He's a chillaxed little bae with tons of patience and loyal to his friends. And he obviously would want to live next door to the kitchens. 

 

Gryffindor - brave, chivalrous and determined. 

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Nicki Minaj: All Anaconda puns aside, Nicki isn't a Slytherin. She's got the heart of a Gryffindor. She's courageous and she stands up for what she believes in, even if it gets her into trouble. She achieves her success by bettering herself, and not belittling others.

Harry Styles: Because he's got the mane of a Lion, innit. (But on a real, Harry is genuinely a Knight in floral suits. He's a very chivalrous lad.)

Ed Sheeran: Because he's a Weasley and all Weasley's end up in Gryffindor. #TruFacts

Tyler Joseph: He would literally die for Josh. Literally. LITERALLY. #TØPTillWeDie

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